• <p> Dean: Nice hands, Cas.
  • Castiel: Uh, thank you..?
  • Dean: I bet they'd look even better wrapped around my-
  • Sam: BIBLE! WRAPPED AROUND THE BIBLE! PRAISE THE LORD, AMEN.</p>


  • When you don't know anything about linguistics: The plural of "memorandum" is "memoranda", why can't people get it right
  • When you know a little about linguistics: The plural of "memorandum" should just be "memorandums" because that's how people naturally say it, "memoranda" is just prescriptivism
  • When you know a lot about linguistics: Oh my god? So certain English words borrowed from Latin and Greek have competing plural forms, with one form using the English plural -s and the other using a borrowed Latin or Greek form? Do you realize how crazy that is - a language borrowing *inflectional morphology* from another language? And here the two competing plural forms have become markers of education, expertise, and social class, isn't that incredible?
  • When you have a degree in linguistics and dgaf anymore: memorandibles
filed under:  #OMFG  #Text


beekeeper-cas:

Okay but actually innocent criminal!Cas and reporter!Dean who has to follow Cas around the whole day to maybe get some new information but well he’s innocent and every time Cas gets out of his car Dean gets out of his and they’re just like
“Hello, Dean”
“Hey Cas, care to elaborate today?”
“Dean, I am still not a part of the crime you’re trying to solve.”
“Police says something else, Cas.”
“Well maybe the police should get their heads out of their butts and carry on with their lives”
“May I quote you on this?”
“Don’t you dare, Dean.”



“ I’m the son of the sea god. Of course I’m salty. ” - percy jackson at some point probably (via seaweedbraens)

filed under:  #PJO  #OMFG


deansurvived:

What if Dean never recovered after the fire when he was four? There are no monsters, just mean orderlies that try to get him to take his medication. Sam has never died, but there were several times when he just couldn’t take seeing Dean like that, locked up in some institution when John couldn’t handle it and left him there, so he doesn’t visit Dean for awhile. He always comes back, though, and Dean hugs him so hard that Sam feels his ribs ache and swears he won’t leave again.

Then an unskilled orderly, Alistair, accidentally hurts Dean when he’s trying to give him medicine. Dean loses it and lashes out, screaming of Hell and demons and flames licking at his body. They lock him in isolation. Dean screams and claws at the walls, spins stories of punishment racks and hellhounds, but he doesn’t get any better. Someone calls Sam, who says he’ll fly out on the next flight.

But a young psychiatrist hears Dean yelling, sees him thrashing about, and can’t stand to let it go. He sneaks off and unlocks Dean’s room, walking up to the man now sprawled on the floor. He bends down and places a hand on his shoulder, and big green eyes stare up at him in wonder.

“I’m Castiel,” the man says. “Would you like to come with me?”

The next day, Sam bursts in to the institution with red-rimmed eyes and hair a mess. He expects to find Dean in full mental breakdown, but instead he finds him in the day room, playing a board game with an amused looking man. Dean sees him and stands to give him a big hug, already spouting off about his forty years of torture and how much he missed Sam. He drags Sam to the table and insists he sit down to play with the angel that pulled him out of Hell.



business email glossary
  • thanks in advance: get this done by the time i press "send"
  • thanks for your interest: why'd you have to bring this up
  • would you be so kind: fucking do it
  • best: i have never physically met you
  • all best: this conversation is over
  • all my best: i wish you would die
  • happy to help: this is the easiest thing in my inbox
  • i hope this helps: i've done all i'm willing to do
  • i did a bit of research: i googled it, because you're too lazy to
  • sorry to chase: answer my email
  • so sorry to chase: answer my FUCKING email
  • i am really sorry for being a pest but: i am LIVID that you are ignoring me
  • please contact my colleague: this isn't my problem
  • i'm copying in my colleague: this isn't my problem and i am thrilled about it
  • i'll check and get back to you: i might forget to
  • i'll let you know when i hear anything: i will forget to
  • can you check back with me in a week?: i'm hoping you will forget to
  • per our earlier conversation: i just yelled at you on the phone
  • great to chat just now: you just yelled at me on the phone
  • thanks!: i'm not mad at you
  • thanks!!: please don't be mad at me
  • thanks!!!: i'm crying at my desk
  • please advise: this might be your fault
  • kindly advise: this is entirely your fault
  • mind if i swing by?: i'm already in the elevator
  • can you confirm for me: you told me before and i deleted the email
  • sorry if that was unclear: i think you're an idiot
  • let me know if you need anything else: please never contact me again
filed under:  #OMFG  #Text


student stereotypes
  • the "general step-mom": very organised, does things ASAP, constantly reminds you of the work you need to do, loves to say i told you so when your stupid ass keeps on postponing said homework until it's almost too late, also checks in to make sure that you managed on time. quote: "have you started on the homework yet?"
  • the "head-in-the-clouds genius": never knows what the fuck is going on, doesn't come to most classes, always has to get reminded about homework and deadlines (repeatedly for the same thing as well), always manages to pass all the exams with pretty high grades in the end. quote: "homework?????? what homework?????"
  • the "duty-bound procrastinator": knows exactly what the fuck is going on, does nothing about the things that need to be done, always finds something else to do instead, feels anxious for postponing all of it, does everything the last second and says it's never going to happen again (a lie). quote: "fuck, homework. i'll, uh, start right after i finish with this movie marathon."


whenshiphitsthefan:

Probably one of the best anagrams of “Sam and Dean Winchester” is “When denim scared Satan.”



  • Magnus: Oh,
  • Magnus: Well imagine,
  • Magnus: As I'm pacing the pews in a church corridor,
  • Magnus: And I can't help but to hear,
  • Magnus: No, I can't help but to hear an exchanging of words
  • Clary: What a beautiful wedding!
  • Magnus: "What a beautiful wedding! What a beautiful wedding!" says a shadowhunter to a daylighter.
  • Izzy: "And, yes, but what a shame, what a shame the poor groom's bride is a..."
  • Alec & Magnus: Woman.


schmerzerling:

I keep seeing posts where people are upset that Dean was angsting about the ship going down in addition to angsting about Cas, thus downplaying the importance of his relationship with Cas. But, honestly, in my opinion, the angst for the ship and the angst for Cas are one in the same.

This week’s episode was called The Vessel, which pretty obviously is a reference to both Castiel as a vessel for Lucifer and the submarine, a sea vessel.  Dean knows the reason that Castiel accepted Lucifer–it was a Greater Good issue. He took Lucifer into himself to take out Amara. 

There was a special emphasis at the end of the episode on Dean wondering what happened to the German ship, asking Sam specifically what became of it. And when he hears that the submarine managed to take out the German ship–only because it took on a massive celestial power and sacrificed itself for the cause–there’s no satisfaction in it. Dean is visibly upset. These people gave everything, and there was nothing he could do about it. 

Maybe that hit a little too close to home. And maybe Dean’s more than a little bit worried that Cas is about to meet the exact same fate.



skillzyo:

I’m going to establish myself as a writer who never writes straight relationships. Then, one fateful day, I’m going to introduce a straight couple. I will make them the healthiest straight relationship ever without ever saying they are a couple. I’ll keep it subtext most of the time. Still, they will be as well developed as my plethora of gay-ass characters. Then, just after subtext becomes maintext and they’ve finally admitted their feelings for one another and given in to those feelings

I’m going to kill one of them off for drama



The Nine Circles of Shipper Hell

shedoesnotcomprehend:

1. limbo – the canon-shippers
Those who ship the actual pairings as they appear in canon. Barely even belong in Shipper Hell at all. Condemned to a miserable dependence on a fickle deity. Featuring: Buffy/Angel; Peeta/Katniss; Edward/Bella.

2. lust – the crack-shippers
Okay, so they ship it, but do they ship it? The mildest ring of shipper hell, for those people who will ship anything on a dare. Condemned to eternal mockery, but let’s be real, that’s not actually a punishment for these guys. Featuring: Bella/Tyler’s Van; Bilbo/Smaug; Hogwarts/Giant Squid.

3. gluttony – the ultra-common-shippers
You know the one ship. It’s the one that’s in every. single. fic. Even if it’s not the focus, it gets thrown in in the background. Condemned to have their fanart shown to the actors on chat shows. Featuring: Dean/Castiel; John/Sherlock; Clint/Coulson.

4. greed – the multi-shippers
They write your favorite pairing, but then when you go to binge on their work it turns out they write EVERYTHING ELSE TOO and OH MY GOD NOT THAT PAIR. Need to pick one OTP like the rest of us. Condemned to be eternally hated by BOTH sides of every shipping war. Featuring: Harry/Ron AND Harry/Luna AND Draco/Ginny.

5. anger – the trash-shippers
Trash and they know it. Sometimes it’s trash/cinnamon roll, sometimes it’s trash/trash, but it’s always trash. Condemned to…IDK, be trash? These guys are pretty up front about it. Featuring: Bucky/Pierce; Sauron/Morgoth; Hux/Kylo.

6. heresy – the rare-pair-shippers
Not to be confused with the crack-shippers. These guys mean it. Oh god do they mean it. They have treatises about Anonymous Pilot #17/That One Guy From The Novelization. Condemned to three fics on AO3, two of which are mistags. Featuring: Rosie Cotton/Erestor; Deadpool/Sif; Ianto/Rory Williams.

7. violence – the NOTP-shippers
That One Ship. The one that inspires Hatred and Outrage in the hearts of All True Believers. They ship it. They are Those People. Condemned to have their ship tags full of indignant posts about BAD EXAMPLES FOR TEENAGE GIRLS. Featuring: Hux/Rey; Dean/Amara; Willow/Kennedy.

8. fraud – the incest-shippers
Sure, we all understand they know it’s wrong in real life. We still edge away nervously. They can just go … do their thing … over there. Condemned to awkward questions about whether they have any siblings, forever. Featuring: Sam/Dean; Thor/Loki; Draco/Lucius.

9. treachery – the ship-burners
The one circle we can all agree to hate. These are the guys who shoot down one ship so they can put their own in. They’re the ones who demonize female characters so they can ship their favorite gays. Not cool, guys. Condemned to MANY ANGRY REVIEWS. Featuring: Gabriel/Sam/Jess; Clint/Thor/Jane; Harry/Ron/Hermione.

filed under:  #Text  #OMFG


charminglyantiquated:

a short comic about witches and wishes and wanting things.



  • Blue: damn gansey
  • Gansey: don't
  • Blue: back at it again with those ugly ass boat shoes












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